The Ultimate Guide To Dating Apps

Don’t give up dating! You are single, but that could change. The one is out there! You may be making one of the most common mistakes on dating apps. Discover them below and change your love life today.


date apps

Do you use dating apps but not really having success with your matches? That probably depends on your requirements. Users regularly mention their turn-offs on their dating profile. Demands such as ‘no smokers’ or ‘no man under 1.80 meters’ are only quite repulsive, according to research.

Did you know that there are specific apps and sites to get a sex date without any strings attached?


Dating expert Charly Lester explains why this doesn’t work and also gives you some tips on how to politely decline your date. Without ‘ghosting’.

dating app

Dating Apps Mistakes

Dating app Inner Circle conducted research into what effect negative language use has on a dating profile. This app has been around since 2012 and was founded by a Dutchman.

What is the Inner Circle dating app?

If you’re tired of dating apps that don’t live up to the hype, you might want to check out Inner Circle. This app is all about quality over quantity, and it’s perfect for busy singles who want to find a meaningful connection.

Inner Circle screens all of its members to ensure they are successful, like-minded people who are looking for a real relationship. As a result, you’ll never have to deal with ghosting, flaking, or any other dating app BS.

Inner Circle also has some awesome features, like exclusive events and parties where you can meet other members in person. So if you’re sick of swiping and ready to meet your match, download Inner Circle and give it a try.

This app is now used worldwide. The researchers discovered that negative language is disastrous for your matches. Why? Users often do not appreciate it if there is a laundry list of don’ts on the profile.

1 | What Not To Write On A Dating App Profile?

woman dating apps

Most Unsuccessful App Profile Texts

Inner Circle concludes that negative language is very repulsive on dating apps. Here are the worst profile texts to get a date:

  • “No duckface”. This profile text results in 95% fewer matches;
  • “I don’t want any”. This bio text gets 92% fewer matches;
  • “No one under six feet” and “don’t have to match” get 77% fewer matches.
dating apps

But still, negative phrases on the dating profile are widely used. This also revealed a top-5 with the most used, negative phrases in the bio. Meant to mention the turn-offs in advance.

  • “I’m not interested in…”
  • “No drama”
  • “Wasting my time”
  • “Not looking for”
  • “No smokers”

2 | Negative Language Means No Dates

This research shows that negative language also produces negative results. Not having success on Tinder, Happn or Inner Circle? Check your bio! Your tone is probably a bit negative.

iPhone fingers

Dating expert Charly Lester explains that you can compare it to a first date. You also do not immediately sum up what you do not want.

“It may be tempting, and sometimes easier, for singles to focus on what they don’t want, but it’s not the best first impression you can make.”

According to Lester, a successful date life goes hand in hand with positivity. “By listing negative traits, you don’t just scare off the people who don’t want you, but also those who do. There are more positive ways to attract the right person. If you’re a tall woman, instead of saying ‘no one under 6’, you can say your own height to match it with similar people.”

3 | Ghosting

woman phone

What does dating app ghosting mean?

Ghosting means ignoring someone and not responding to a dating app anymore. It is a sensitive point among the users. Lester has something to say about that too. Because we can really improve a few things there.

Do you tend to “ghost” someone? Read the alternatives below.

6 Polite Reactions When You’re Tend to Ghost

lonely lady

Situation 1: The chat conversation drops dead

According to Lester, not everyone is good at having a conversation via chat or social media. Some people appear different in messages than they are in real life.

The dating expert explains that it is best to give someone the benefit of the doubt or opt for a video call. If you are really turned off by someone’s messages, do not choose ‘ghosting‘. Then it is best to send the following sentence:

“I thought it was interesting getting to know you. I just think that our way of communicating doesn’t really fit together. But I hope you eventually meet a nice person.”

Situation 2: You went on a first date, but there was no click.

man smartphone

Things will go a lot easier if you create clarity. Be polite, honest and not over-excited. “Thank you for last night. It was refreshing to meet someone again. Frankly, I just don’t see a future for us. But I hope you meet the right person.”

Situation 3: you get ‘red flags’

phone chat

According to the dating expert, this is an interesting situation. She explains that it takes quite a bit of guts to show someone your identified ‘red flags’. But this can turn into an awkward conversation. That is why people often choose to silently ‘ghost’ someone.

What is the best thing to say at red flags according to the dating expert? “Thank you for your messages. I just don’t think we’re a good match. But I do wish you the best of luck with your dating.”

However, Lester emphasizes that when the ‘red flags’ cross borders, it is wise to report to the dating app and block this person.

Situation 4: You’re not ready to date, but you don’t dare admit it to yourself.


In this situation, you should start by being honest with yourself. Then you can also be honest with others.

“I’m sorry, I really appreciated getting to know you, but the more time we spent together, the more I realized I’m not ready to build something with anyone.”

It may be that someone is willing to wait and will contact you again at a later stage. If you don’t want this, answer with number 2 from the suggestion list.

Situation 5: Someone is going too fast

Again, according to the dating experts, honesty pays off. Is someone going too fast? Then say that honestly. Don’t wait too long.

According to the dating expert, you should also look at the situation of yourself and the other person. If the other person just got out of a relationship, it may be that someone gets things going faster and wants to continue in the same way.

dating help

For yourself, it is advisable to ask yourself if you are ready to date (number 4). Despite that, do you find that someone is still rushing things, there is again a good answer: “I’m sorry, this is all going a bit too fast for me. I need some time to step back and figure out what I want.”

Situation 6: You’re Dating Someone Else

This is a common situation nowadays. Don’t assume that you are the only one for someone during the dating phase, because chances are there are more candidates. Especially on dating apps.

If you do have someone in sight that you prefer, it is nice to let someone else know and not to ‘ghost’ someone.

“As you know, I have also had contact with others. Last night I decided with someone to only date each other. I really enjoyed getting to know you these last few weeks and I hope you find a wonderful person.”

fun date
A fun date.

Best Dating Apps in Netherlands

Which dating app is right for you depends on your preferences. Each app has its own unique features, advantages and disadvantages. That’s why we listed the 7 best dating apps for you. Discover them below.

1 | Tinder

The most famous and one of the best dating apps in The Netherlands is Tinder. This dating app is known for its ‘swiping’, introduced 10 years ago. When you see someone you find attractive, swipe right.

Is someone’s first impression not good? Then swipe left to reject this person. Do you like someone and is it mutual? Then there is a match and you can contact each other!

couple in love

How to unmatch on Tinder?

It allows users to swipe right if they are interested in someone, and left if they are not. However, sometimes people make the mistake of swiping right when they should have swiped left.

If you find yourself in this situation, don’t panic! There is a way to undo your mistake:

  • Simply go to your Tinder profile
  • Tap on the “Settings” icon.
  • From there, you will see an option to “Unmatch.”
  • Tap on this
  • Confirm that you want to unmatch the person in question.

And that’s all there is to it! So next time you accidentally match with someone on Tinder, remember that it’s not the end of the world. There is a way to fix your mistake.

What does the blue star mean on Tinder?

If you’ve ever been curious about that blue star on Tinder, wonder no more! It turns out, the blue star means that someone has Super Liked you.

This happens when someone swipes up on your profile instead of just swiping right. It’s a way of letting you know that they’re really into you and are hoping to match with you.

So, if you see a blue star on someone’s profile, it’s a pretty good indication that they’re interested in getting to know you better. So go ahead and start chatting!

How to send pictures on Tinder?

If you’re looking to send pictures on Tinder, there are a few things you need to know.

  • First, make sure you have the latest version of the app installed.
  • Then, open up the app and go to your profile page.
  • From there, you’ll see an option to add pictures.
  • Simply select the pictures you want to add.
  • Then tap the ‘done’ button.

Once your pictures are added, they’ll be visible to potential matches. So go ahead and show off your best side – your pictures are sure to make a lasting impression.

2 | Inner Circle

The dating app Inner Circle focuses on finding the perfect match for you. All profiles are verified and you can use filters to find other people who suit you. The Inner Circle app got its name for a reason. You must be invited to Inner Circle and get approval to use this dating app.

3 | Lexa

Lexa is quite famous. What makes this dating app so interesting is that there is a very wide choice of singles.


It is one of the most popular and best dating apps in the Netherlands. The chance of a serious relationship is increased by the handy match system that Lexa uses. This way you will immediately see profiles that match your preferences and interests.

4 | Her

Less known than the previous ones. The dating app Her is specially made for women who are looking for other women. Within the Her app you can look for a serious partner, a flirt or a nice friendship. Because the app focuses on a specific audience, you can be sure that you will find people who have the same preferences as you.

5 | Grindr

The dating app Grindr is made for men who are looking for other men, bisexuals and transgenders who like to connect with each other. The dating app Grindr is known more as a flirt or hook-up app than a dating app in which committed relationships are entered into.

6 | Happn

The Happn dating app takes dating to a new level. With the Happn dating app you can find people you have encountered in daily life. Think of that one nice man or woman you passed in the park or this one nice lady or gentleman you met in the supermarket. If this person also has the Happn app and you like each other, then there is a match!

7 | Bumble

Have you ever heard of Bumble? Within the Bumble dating app, women are the first to move. With its dating app, Bumble wants to offer a platform based on equality and respect.

Putting the initiative in the hands of women changes the rules of dating. What makes Bumble great is that it is a platform where you can search for a relationship with content, find new friends or expand your business network.

Sex Dating Sites

sex bed

Are you really disappointed in the regular dating apps? Then try the sex dating websites. Here people meet others who want a sex date, without any obligations. It is extremely popular in the Netherlands. It’s free, too!

Both among women and among men. Give it a try. Why not? Signing up costs nothing, so you have nothing to lose.



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